my prayer

this is my prayer right now. so it may be a bit personal but this is my blog so i can do what i want on it :) how i am doing is so clearly reflected through what i am praying. so here it is.

Jesus, thank you for the way that you love me. that your grace is so plentiful and that you delight in giving it. that i shouldnt feel guilty for receiving grace from you, that it doesnt mean that i am using you, it means that you love to be intimate with me and i am so broken so that is the way you can make it owrk.  i want to live in affection for you jesus. i want to pour my heart out for you everyday and in everything that i do. jesus let me do nothing out of selfishness but just out of love for you.  god, my need for you is so great and i cannot get enough of you. you are my best friend and i long for a deeper relationship with you and that i will not confuse what you are saying with my own desires.  i pray for a purity over my relationship iwth you. that i can be honest with myself and others as bad as it makes me look or as silly as i feel.  let me not forget your mercy and let me not forget the secret moments that we have together.  you are good and thank you for the joy that you have been lavishing on me.  thank you for chicago and for brgining me here and providing for me here in every way possible. i want to love you with all that i am. all my heart mind and strength and let you be my purpose for everything. i am yours lord and thank you for loving me first.  that in your love i can begin to love you.  you astonish me. amen